Things Looking Lively Again

I’m at a curious time in my life. A lot of my unrest and dissatisfaction passed along with 2010. I was unhappy with the quality of my work, my 9-5 job was making me anxious, and my personal life went to the pits a couple times. Lots o’ struggle with little benefit. 2010 was a year of growing pains. It was also freaking awesome in some ways. The highlight was undoubtedly the screening of Thirsty Guy at Dances With Films in West Hollywood. We killed. My collaborations with Noah Sife were very productive and fun. I even had a girlfriend which, albiet briefly, is probably some kind of proof of God. The best week was spent with my family at Cannon Beach Christian Conference Center. The highs and lows provided some much needed maturity (but not too much! Screw you, Adulthood!).

But now all is calm. I’ve found peace with my 9-5 job. It’s no longer something I look at as a hindrance to success. On the contrary, it’s there to provide me sustenance along my struggle, but more importantly, motivation to succeed. My frustrations with the quality of my work have subsided as well. The challenge of making something interesting and funny for even two minutes was so daunting I almost unraveled like the shirt I’m “wearing” right now. But something clicked over the last few months. Writing a screenplay certainly forced me to improve. But the greatest test was last Tuesday, when my sketch group Dingbat had our first live show. 11 days prior I had no cast and no skits, and almost canceled. But the challenge of putting together a 30 minute show in such limited time was too exciting a challenge and I had to forge on. I got the cast, wrote the scripts and we put together a 30 minute show in three days and killed it. It was probably the proudest moment of my life. We’re performing again in a few weeks and hope to get many more shows in the near future. The promise we’ve shown has given me peace.

There is so much to improve upon, but the work doesn’t seem daunting anymore. It seems inevitable. Last year I would wonder if I would ever be good enough to make something consistently interesting for any length of time. At moments the level of perfection I was aiming for seemed out of reach. But not anymore. All you need for a comedy is a solid structure, then work from there. Measure the beats of your story and make sure none pass without something funny happening. Yes, it’s a lot of work, but Buster Keaton once said making a comedy is as fine a craft as making a clock. I’m sure being a clocksmith (word?) is pulse-grindingly difficult, but getting the sucker to tick isn’t unattainable. The same is true with comedy. Of course I’ve never succeeded at this, but uh… Moving on!

I’m on the precipus of finding my career and it feels calm. The immediate future will likely hold some unimaginable struggle; perhaps a tour for Dingbat or finding funding for my script. One day I may look back on this time as the strangest of my life. Feeling success is coming, but having no tangible proof. Just knowing something is different. “Calm” doesn’t mean “relaxed” however. I’m working harder than ever, just more focused. That’s another good word for how I feel right now: focused.

Things are fun again. Noah now lives just a floor below me and we collaborate on skits and ideas frequently. My friend Vince has started shooting again. We just shot a little adventure finding rats in Santee Alley. Tom and I are still a real life Calvin and Hobbes going on hikes, playing basketball, and just hanging out. Life is fun. But it hasn’t really begun yet. I have a feeling it’s about to.

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